Hwk 46

Growing up I have always been kept at a distance when it came to anything related to death. The only time I can recall myself being in a situation where I was “close” to death is when I was very young. One time while attending madrasah, my class was told to join a special prayer for the passing of someone. I remember that this prayer was a little different compared to the five daily prayers I perform. The only reason why I was able to take a part in this event was because I wasn’t under the supervision of my parents. If my parents, in this particular case my mom were with me at the time she would have hesitated in giving me permission to attend. I know she would have said yes, but it wouldn’t be a yes without giving much thought to it. I think there are many reasons for this; some are understandable, while others aren’t. I usually feel as if my parents (again, especially my mom) tend to try to keep me far away from anything related to death.

Caring for the dead is perceived differently in each and every culture. From what I see here living amongst Western culture, movies and the media have a different approach about caring for the dead. This is very different when compared to how it is perceived back at home. Even though the rituals may differ, I think most of us have the same type of feelings when it comes to caring for the dead; loss, grief, sorrow, etc…I have never seen a real dead body in person, and to be honest I wouldn’t be so fond of seeing one either. Thinking of a cold, motionless body is a scary thought (at least for me). I know that we all have a reason to react a certain way after a death and these may be similar in many ways, but our beliefs and approaches differ in many ways.

It’s been a year now since my grandfather died; my parents were able to visit him in Pakistan at the time he was sick. Some moments after they had arrived to the hospital, my grandfather died because of some complications. After coming back from their gruesome trip, I was able to ask my parents about how they had cared for my grandfather (grandfather’s body) after he had died. In our culture as soon as someone dies their body is taken away to be washed in order to get ready for its grave. After being washed the body is covered with a white cloth and all men close in family take the body away to the grave site. This is very different from how death is portrayed here in the United States. I don’t have much knowledge on American funerals or memorial services, but from what I have seen and heard care of the dead in this society differs in many ways from how the dead are cared for back at home.
What are the benefits of a coffin? Will these benefits help the dead in the “afterlife”?

Questions:
-How much does a funeral cost? How do these costs differ in different societies?
-Why does the color black represent death? (usually worn to funerals)
-Can one be happy while caring for the dead?
-Does an individual plan their own funeral, or do their close ones plan it for them?
-How does one feel while planning their own funeral? We often tend to plan our wedding or plan a birth; why isn’t planning your own funeral as big of a concern?