Hwk 29

Facing Terminal Illness:
Facing terminal illness can be a different experience for each and every patient. Yet there is one thing common indeed; there is no way around it. It is a fact that this terminally ill patient will approach death in the near time; even though it might be hard to accept the patient and his or her loved ones will have to accept. The patient and his loved ones may react to this bitter fact by becoming a fighter or stoic as did Beth’s husband Eric. Others may respond to it with a different approach such as depression, or have positive insights on life. In Tuesdays with Morrie, a sociologist professor named Morrie is diagnosed with a terminal disease labeled as ALS. Upon finding this out, a former student of his then begins to meet with his sick professor every Tuesday and becomes aware that even at his age he has much more to learn about life. Morrie tells Mitch many of his insights while being labeled as a terminally ill patient. At one point he states: "As you grow old, you learn more. If you stayed at twenty-two, you'd always be as ignorant as you were at twenty-two. Aging is not just decay, you know. It's growth. It's more than the negative that you're going to die, its also the positive that you understand you're going to die, and that you live a better life because of it." (Alboom, 118)

There are many different responses that we receive from terminally ill patients. Upon finding out that their days are literally numbered, we learn about patients with positive, stoic and depressed reactions. Beth told us that her husband responded to his incurable illness as a fighter but remained stoic. This is a common response from the society we live in today; we suddenly become aware of our body. We try to digest a bitter fact that we are all aware of. Even though we try to fight against death we are always defeated, may it be sooner or later. Beth and her family approached Eric’s sickness in a positive and friendly way considering that he may no longer be with them for a long period of time. Upon knowing the truth about her husband, Beth tried to avoid negative thoughts: “ Sometimes I would be taking Evan to school and I would start to have negative thoughts about Eric’s illness, but then I would try to ignore them” In Tuesdays with Morrie readers were able to view Morrie as an individual who approached his terminal illness by gaining positive insights about illness and death. This shows us that there is a wide variety of reactions that one can receive from a terminally ill patient.

Process of Dying:
Death can approach one in any shape or form; may it take place in a hospital, a home or on the street. You may know that it will occur soon or you may not, but this is not up to us. There are many steps that need to be reached for one to be claimed dead. Beth's husband Eric was considered a healthy man until he was diagnosed with Advanced Metastatic Kidney Cancer. From then on to his death Beth and her husband went through a series of hospital visits, chemo therapy, and clinical trials. But in Eric's case it was a bit too late since he had reached to stage four meaning that the cancer had been fully spread throughout his body. As time went by Eric was having dramatic weight loss, changed his diet to J ello and wasn't capable of using the restroom himself. Eric had a home death in his bed early in the morning.

There are many changes that take place upon the ill patient and his loved ones. In Beth's case she grew closer to her husband after he was diagnosed with cancer. She stated: "these were the best days of her marriage out of the 27 years we spent together, because there was nothing else to think about but him." The process of dying is definitely a time in which the ill patient and their loved ones become closer to one another and create a tight knit bondage. In Near Death viewers were exposed to a new world that is usually kept away from the public view. Viewers were able to take a glimpse inside a hospital making all efforts to cure their ill patients. Near Death showed the process of death taking place in hospital. With doctors discussing possible alternatives to visits from loved ones; all efforts were made to keep the ill patient live a longer life.

Isolation:
Isolation is a big role that plays in illness and dying; may it be from the ill patient or from a beloved one. When becoming sick or near death we either become closer with our loved ones or we suddenly become really isolated. While making a trip to the hospital, I was exposed many patients with their their loved ones, while some were left alone as they stared at the ceiling. This may have been because they were not close with their families, or because they refused to have someone visit them; this may be a result of stigma. Being ill or near death causes a intense change in ones life, whether it be positive or negative. It is common for the ill patient to feel as if they are apart from those who live their life happily.

In Stigma Goffman states: “The attitudes we normal have toward a person with a stigma, and the actions we take in regard to him, are well known, since these responses are what benevolent social action is designed to soften and ameliorate. By definition, of course, we believe the person with a stigma is not quite human.” (Goffman, 5) “ When one becomes near death or ill, others treat him/her as if they are from a different planet visiting our world. We treat them differently when compared to our treatment of others. Some individuals try to make a gain for them self while being stigmatized. " The stigmatized individual is likely to use his stigma for “secondary gains,” as an excuse for ill success that has come his way for other reasons: For years the scar, harelip or misshapen nose has been looked on as a handicap, and its importance in the social and emotional adjustment is unconsciously all embracing.” (Goffman, 10)

Being Sick:
Being sick is quite an experience, and all of us have experienced it, may it be one way or another. While thinking to my self and gathering opinions from family, I noticed that upon becoming sick we are treated differently. Being sick helps us experience a new side of ourself, we leran to accept that something in our body is not quite right. This is when we realize that we start to worry about our self in a sense that we should start to take better care of our self. While sick we become aware of our bodily functions; we become aware of our physicality. Talking with my family members and from my own experiences, I feel that being sick is another thing on the list that brings us together. Becoming sick is like a pinch we receive to wake up from a good dream. In this time period we realize that we will not live this life for eternity, instead we have a limited time. In light cases our bodies tell us to take better care of ourselves, while serious cases reveal that we have a limited time to live life. There are many different ways each culture approaches the topic labeled sickness and death. In our society today, death and illness has a curtain covering it so that it stays protected from the public. Our society gives us many different options to approach sickness and death; such as the options of holistic or homeopathic remedies. By attempting to cure our bodies with these treatments, we are able to take a step back and view the world from a different angle. Upon becoming sick we all relate to the quote from an indian movie: " live... be happy... smile... Who knows? Tomorrow may not be..."