Growing up as a Muslim I wasn’t exposed to any topics related to death and the afterlife. I have basic knowledge on the topic, but I want to form a deeper meaning on this concept. I decided to read translations from the Quran and Hadith that are based on the issue of death and the afterlife. Muslims believe that after facing the judgment of Allah they will either enter through the gates of paradise or go to hell. This decision is based upon how one lives their life and how much faith they have. Right after ones death, the soul is taken from the body by angels. The newly dead will be asked three questions which will determine how he/she will spend the time in his/her grave. These three questions are: Who is your God? Who is your Prophet? and lastly, what is your faith? If the newly dead answers these questions correctly he/she will spend the time in their grave accordingly until the day of resuurection.
Reading through the translations from the Quran and the Hadith I thought to myself about how I view caring for the dead. After reading and viewing how the American society and how they approach their dead, I was able to compare and contast on a different level. Some of the basic concepts are the same, but there are a number of small things which tend to make an Islamic approach to death very different when compared to the American approach to death. Before reading parts from the Quran and Hadith on death in Islam, I have had vague knowledge on how Islam teaches its followers about caring for the dead and the afterlife. I already knew most of what I read, but I was able to learn about everything on a much deeper level. I think the way Islam approaches death is the way everyone should approach death. The afterlife in Islam shapes how many Muslim people live their lives in this world. By following all the sayings from the Quran and the Hadith they will have a better chance of entering through the gates of paradise. But if they commit sins and lie throughout their life they will serve justice in Hell. It also depends on ones faith and how true they are to their faith.
“The soul of the faithful person, which is easily removed from the body, is clothed in a heavenly and sweet smelling garment by radiant and smiling angels. The soul is taken through the seven heavens, entering the presence of God who then orders the angels to return the soul to its earthly body until the day of judgment. On the other hand, the soul of the unbelieving person is removed from its body with a great deal of struggle. The angel of death clothes the soul with a foul smelling garment. The angel responsible for the wicked soul also tries to take the soul through the various levels of heaven but he gates of heaven are not opened to them." (Qur'an 7:40)
I decided to interview the Imam from the Masjid near my house. Angels are mentioned throughout the Quran and many Hadith. I know that Christianity and Judaism mentions angels as they do in Islam, so I decided to ask him if there are any similarities or differences between these angels. He replied: “Yes. angels in Islam are believed to be the same way as they are in Christianity and Judaism. They are sent by God to be with humans and help them right their deeds or protect them. If someone is in danger an angel can be sent down in the form of another person to assist the one in need of help.” (Shamsi). I was aware that the Christian and Jewish faith had belief in angels, but I didn’t know that the angels serve the same purpose in all three major faiths. Then I asked him about the afterlife and if we will have any relations with others such as our spouses from this life. He replied: “God mentions that if those that are admitted into Heaven are single, they would be married or paired off. They would have 'purified spouses' in paradise." (Shamsi) I thought this was interesting; I have heard that the one you marry in this life stays with you in the afterlife, but I wasn't clear about it until now.
After interviewing the Imam in addition to my research, I was able to have a much better understanding on the afterlife based on the Islamic faith and how it is very similar to other faiths. Even though the concept is similar in all faiths, the American society tends to deal with caring for the dead in a different manner. For example in the film titled "The Family Undertaking" the families of the deceased were dressing up the body in favorite clothing and decorating the caskets. This makes no sense to me because none of this will affect the one who has enetered their afterlife. They have left this world for good, and no matter what is done here in rememberance of the deceased there will be no change on their afterlife (this is my personal belief based on Islamic faith). In Islam instead of performing such rituals while caring for the dead, we make sure to recite the Quran as many times as possible and do good deeds such as helping out in charity on behalf of the newly deceased. I personally feel that the Islamic way of caring for the dead and its beliefs on the afterlife are essential to how I live my life. If it weren’t for the afterlife I would be living a meaningless life. This life for me is basically a test for me; if I pass I will enter through the gates of heaven, but if I fail I will go to hell and serve justice for my sins.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Hwk 53
A.)
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/05/04/opinion/04iht-edhalevi.1.5565834.html
Precis:
Not many non-Muslims are aware of the Islamic views on death and the afterlife. In Islamic beliefs, the time between death and burial allows the spirit to witness its body and how it is buried. It is then approached with two angels that question him about his/her life in this world and review all his/her deeds. This will then determine how he/she will wait until the final Day of Judgment. If the Muslim had committed many sins and was not respectable to his/her faith, he/she would experience “torture in the grave”. To ignore this torture, many Muslims seek out for prayers and commit good sins.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/12/13/nyregion/13burial.html?adxnnl=1&adxnnlx=1305025630-1KTK2qWTHZq4XOKJbwT/CQ
Precis:
Many Jewish individuals are reforming the way they approach how they care for the dead based on their religious beliefs. During a burial, many of us tend to forget about body itself. The number of Chevra Kadishas in the United States is on the rise since the 1970’s till now. Many Jewish individuals are taking time to learn about the proper way of burial and caring for the dead by attending their local Jewish center. The way to approach the dead is very similar to how one should approach an infant. A funeral in Jewish customs is a very private affair; they are not fond of exposing such an affair to the public.
Analysis:
Coming from a religious Muslim family I am used to following a set of rules for practically everything I do in my life. While reading the first article I was able to connect to myself and how I would approach caring for the dead. After reading the second article I was able to take away a better understanding of how other religions approach caring for the dead. Many of us have come into the United States as immigrants and have lost our religious and traditional roots. We have transformed and it has become hard to tell who we are or where we actually came from. Reading about the Jewish community and how they have become closer to their religion while approaching death over the last few decades, I thought to myself why more communities aren't doing the same thing.
Even though I have grown up being taught about every aspect of life the Islamic way, I was frightened to read about the possibility of “torture after death”. I am constantly reminded of the way I am supposed to live my life and how it will be the outcome of my afterlife. After reading the first article I was once again reminded of this fact. This helps me construct a certain way of how I should live and behave in the society I am a part of . Because I live in the midst of a population whose majority does not have the same religious beliefs as me, I am sometimes sidetracked into trying to figure out what I should do in any situation. By gaining knowledge on such aspects of life, I am automatically pushed back into the right path.
B.)
I decided to do my interview through a simple email; Gutterman Funeral Directors gave me a reply within two days. I approached them with a few questions about how they deal with their business and their customers. Most of the responses I got were very vague. I asked them about how people set up their own funerals. They said that this is a very common case; some customers act a bit awkward while talking about such a situation, while others discuss the matter as if they would be discussing any other topic. This gives them a chance to discuss how they want their funeral and make sure they give as many details as possible. When people set up a funeral for their loved ones they are not very sure of how their loved one would have wanted things to go during their funeral. By having someone set up their own funeral they are able to ensure that their final wishes are carried out thoroughly.
I then asked about how the public reacts when they learn that they are dealing with someone who works in the funeral industry. They replied by saying that they usually get a normal response, but sometimes they sense a bit of awkwardness when they share such a fact. I later on asked about if they enjoy working in the funeral industry; they said they feel as if they have the need to work in the funeral industry. It helps them connect with others in a way not many of us are able to connect with each other. They are able to help fulfill their customers and their last wishes in order to make sure they get what they deserve. It is tough to ensure all the wishes of the deceased exactly how their families want them to be carried out. At the end of the funeral service they state that they are glad to take part of fulfilling all their last desires.
I felt like the responses I received were sugar coated coffee beans; sweet on the outside yet bitter in the inside. After reading Mitford’s The American way of Death Revisited, I realized that the funeral industry is yet another industry which tends to fool its costumers into paying unnecessary sums of cash. These people only want your money nothing else. Unless if they are willing to do such an act at no cost, I will not be able to believe that they are fulfilling all the needs of the customer. It’s always a give and take system in our society; we are willing to do something, but always it will only be done at a price. In this particular case, any price won’t do; the price has to meet with the high requirements of those in the funeral industry. It makes no sense at all to offer services which have no effect on the one who is already passed on. Offer services such as embalming, dressing up the body in its favorite clothes, etc... will only affect those who are living. I believe that we all leave this world with what we came with; 2 books, one which has been recorded with our good deeds and another which has been recorded with our bad deeds.
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/05/04/opinion/04iht-edhalevi.1.5565834.html
Precis:
Not many non-Muslims are aware of the Islamic views on death and the afterlife. In Islamic beliefs, the time between death and burial allows the spirit to witness its body and how it is buried. It is then approached with two angels that question him about his/her life in this world and review all his/her deeds. This will then determine how he/she will wait until the final Day of Judgment. If the Muslim had committed many sins and was not respectable to his/her faith, he/she would experience “torture in the grave”. To ignore this torture, many Muslims seek out for prayers and commit good sins.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/12/13/nyregion/13burial.html?adxnnl=1&adxnnlx=1305025630-1KTK2qWTHZq4XOKJbwT/CQ
Precis:
Many Jewish individuals are reforming the way they approach how they care for the dead based on their religious beliefs. During a burial, many of us tend to forget about body itself. The number of Chevra Kadishas in the United States is on the rise since the 1970’s till now. Many Jewish individuals are taking time to learn about the proper way of burial and caring for the dead by attending their local Jewish center. The way to approach the dead is very similar to how one should approach an infant. A funeral in Jewish customs is a very private affair; they are not fond of exposing such an affair to the public.
Analysis:
Coming from a religious Muslim family I am used to following a set of rules for practically everything I do in my life. While reading the first article I was able to connect to myself and how I would approach caring for the dead. After reading the second article I was able to take away a better understanding of how other religions approach caring for the dead. Many of us have come into the United States as immigrants and have lost our religious and traditional roots. We have transformed and it has become hard to tell who we are or where we actually came from. Reading about the Jewish community and how they have become closer to their religion while approaching death over the last few decades, I thought to myself why more communities aren't doing the same thing.
Even though I have grown up being taught about every aspect of life the Islamic way, I was frightened to read about the possibility of “torture after death”. I am constantly reminded of the way I am supposed to live my life and how it will be the outcome of my afterlife. After reading the first article I was once again reminded of this fact. This helps me construct a certain way of how I should live and behave in the society I am a part of . Because I live in the midst of a population whose majority does not have the same religious beliefs as me, I am sometimes sidetracked into trying to figure out what I should do in any situation. By gaining knowledge on such aspects of life, I am automatically pushed back into the right path.
B.)
I decided to do my interview through a simple email; Gutterman Funeral Directors gave me a reply within two days. I approached them with a few questions about how they deal with their business and their customers. Most of the responses I got were very vague. I asked them about how people set up their own funerals. They said that this is a very common case; some customers act a bit awkward while talking about such a situation, while others discuss the matter as if they would be discussing any other topic. This gives them a chance to discuss how they want their funeral and make sure they give as many details as possible. When people set up a funeral for their loved ones they are not very sure of how their loved one would have wanted things to go during their funeral. By having someone set up their own funeral they are able to ensure that their final wishes are carried out thoroughly.
I then asked about how the public reacts when they learn that they are dealing with someone who works in the funeral industry. They replied by saying that they usually get a normal response, but sometimes they sense a bit of awkwardness when they share such a fact. I later on asked about if they enjoy working in the funeral industry; they said they feel as if they have the need to work in the funeral industry. It helps them connect with others in a way not many of us are able to connect with each other. They are able to help fulfill their customers and their last wishes in order to make sure they get what they deserve. It is tough to ensure all the wishes of the deceased exactly how their families want them to be carried out. At the end of the funeral service they state that they are glad to take part of fulfilling all their last desires.
I felt like the responses I received were sugar coated coffee beans; sweet on the outside yet bitter in the inside. After reading Mitford’s The American way of Death Revisited, I realized that the funeral industry is yet another industry which tends to fool its costumers into paying unnecessary sums of cash. These people only want your money nothing else. Unless if they are willing to do such an act at no cost, I will not be able to believe that they are fulfilling all the needs of the customer. It’s always a give and take system in our society; we are willing to do something, but always it will only be done at a price. In this particular case, any price won’t do; the price has to meet with the high requirements of those in the funeral industry. It makes no sense at all to offer services which have no effect on the one who is already passed on. Offer services such as embalming, dressing up the body in its favorite clothes, etc... will only affect those who are living. I believe that we all leave this world with what we came with; 2 books, one which has been recorded with our good deeds and another which has been recorded with our bad deeds.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Hwk 52
Precis:
The method of embalming dates back to Ancient Egypt; many individuals in the funeral industry like the idea of embalming since it is an easy way to earn a good sum of cash. Funeral directors will use a long list of excuses for you to fall under the impression that embalming is a necessary part of a burial. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) has attempted to try and fix the flawed funeral industry, yet failed to do so. England approaches death in a different manner when compared to our modern approach to death in the United States. Funerals in England are not as pricey as they are in the U.S. and the customers aren’t fooled into paying more money for a greater profit. Some Americans are leaning towards an effortless funeral for their loved one(s) and this tends to frighten the funeral industry.
Quotes:
-"Bring me my porridge" - while not earth-shattering, have at least the merit of being historically accurate" (pg. 153).
-“Well, maybe the husband is trying to guy her up a bit. Perhaps he was always saying to her, ‘you should go on a diet,’ and now he is just getting even. Who knows?” (pg. 179)
-“Can You Afford to Die?” (pg. 252)
Analysis:
In our society today, the approach to caring for the dead compares in many ways to how we approach food. We are always selfish with our customers in order to gain a greater profit. We tend to fool the public by using a flawed system to present a polished industry. In the food unit flawed systems were set up throughout the United States in order to provide consumers with fruits and vegetables grown with the help of pesticides, and meat which was provided with the help of stimulating the growth of animals. To keep the public hidden from all this, they were presented in a way for them to assume as if everything was done the way it is supposed to be done. Comparatively, the U.S. approaches the care of the dead in a similar manner. People who take part of the funeral industry are after the money; they have no concerns with their customers and their emotions. They will make up any excuses they have to get the highest sum of pay possible. They use the method of embalming to earn a good amount of cash. They will offer you services which will make the funeral of your loved one(s) look “prettier” and worth spending large sums of money on. I don’t think this connects to only the Food unit; it connects with all our prior units. In each and every unit we saw that people will do anything to get what they want; in this case money.
The method of embalming dates back to Ancient Egypt; many individuals in the funeral industry like the idea of embalming since it is an easy way to earn a good sum of cash. Funeral directors will use a long list of excuses for you to fall under the impression that embalming is a necessary part of a burial. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) has attempted to try and fix the flawed funeral industry, yet failed to do so. England approaches death in a different manner when compared to our modern approach to death in the United States. Funerals in England are not as pricey as they are in the U.S. and the customers aren’t fooled into paying more money for a greater profit. Some Americans are leaning towards an effortless funeral for their loved one(s) and this tends to frighten the funeral industry.
Quotes:
-"Bring me my porridge" - while not earth-shattering, have at least the merit of being historically accurate" (pg. 153).
-“Well, maybe the husband is trying to guy her up a bit. Perhaps he was always saying to her, ‘you should go on a diet,’ and now he is just getting even. Who knows?” (pg. 179)
-“Can You Afford to Die?” (pg. 252)
Analysis:
In our society today, the approach to caring for the dead compares in many ways to how we approach food. We are always selfish with our customers in order to gain a greater profit. We tend to fool the public by using a flawed system to present a polished industry. In the food unit flawed systems were set up throughout the United States in order to provide consumers with fruits and vegetables grown with the help of pesticides, and meat which was provided with the help of stimulating the growth of animals. To keep the public hidden from all this, they were presented in a way for them to assume as if everything was done the way it is supposed to be done. Comparatively, the U.S. approaches the care of the dead in a similar manner. People who take part of the funeral industry are after the money; they have no concerns with their customers and their emotions. They will make up any excuses they have to get the highest sum of pay possible. They use the method of embalming to earn a good amount of cash. They will offer you services which will make the funeral of your loved one(s) look “prettier” and worth spending large sums of money on. I don’t think this connects to only the Food unit; it connects with all our prior units. In each and every unit we saw that people will do anything to get what they want; in this case money.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Hwk 51
Precis:
The number of deaths is on the rise as a result of population growth, in other words there will always be hope for profit for those in the funeral industry. These people are purchasing land, then selling it off piece by piece while setting rules which will be followed by their customers. If you thought you were done with purchasing just this piece of land then you are wrong. You will still have a need to purchase other accessories such as flowers, or a plaque to help beautify your loved ones burial spot. People in the funeral industry make you think that your money is used for services such as having a nice location for the burial, but in reality most of the money is for the cemetery owners personal expenses. Um options are being expanded since cremation rates are on the rise. Even though cremation is cheaper, these people will try their hardest to do business with you at a price which will keep them content. If you choose to cremate the body of a loved one, they will offer you a space for the um can be kept in.
Quotes:
*I don't really like this book...so it's hard to find quotes I actually enjoy reading through...
-“Dear friend, In a few weeks the forsythia and daffodils will raise their golden horns to the sky and trumpet in the warm winds of spring” (pg. 94).
-"In sober fact, every day is a day of judgment" (page 113).
-“The theme that the American public, rather than the funeral industry, is responsible for our funeral practices-because it demands “the best” in embalming and merchandise for the dead-is one often expounded by funeral men. ‘We are merely giving the public what it wants,’ they say” (pg. 123).
Analysis:
It saddens me to see that the funeral industry takes advantage of emotions in order for their pockets to be filled. They use a number of alternatives to try and fool their customers to pay them more money than needed. Our society is very self-centered; in all of the books I have read in this course I noticed that people in our society will do anything to get what they want, in this case it would be money. They will make up excuses to earn some extra cash, for example when a customer wants a body to be cremated they are offered space for the um to be kept in at a “good” price. I think that’s absurd, now a day’s people will offer anything they can in order to get a hold of money. Our society is fond of taking one aspect and dissecting it in every which way possible to get a good profit. I find it to be strange that so many of us tend to fall for it; we are always too busy with unnecessary occupancies to notice the harsh reality which we are facing. With every twist and turn we take in this society we will be fooled to pay more than what we should actually be paying. I think Mitford does a good job of getting this point across to her readers. She uses her sense of humor to keep her readers entertained, yet realize what goes on in our society behind drawn curtains.
The number of deaths is on the rise as a result of population growth, in other words there will always be hope for profit for those in the funeral industry. These people are purchasing land, then selling it off piece by piece while setting rules which will be followed by their customers. If you thought you were done with purchasing just this piece of land then you are wrong. You will still have a need to purchase other accessories such as flowers, or a plaque to help beautify your loved ones burial spot. People in the funeral industry make you think that your money is used for services such as having a nice location for the burial, but in reality most of the money is for the cemetery owners personal expenses. Um options are being expanded since cremation rates are on the rise. Even though cremation is cheaper, these people will try their hardest to do business with you at a price which will keep them content. If you choose to cremate the body of a loved one, they will offer you a space for the um can be kept in.
Quotes:
*I don't really like this book...so it's hard to find quotes I actually enjoy reading through...
-“Dear friend, In a few weeks the forsythia and daffodils will raise their golden horns to the sky and trumpet in the warm winds of spring” (pg. 94).
-"In sober fact, every day is a day of judgment" (page 113).
-“The theme that the American public, rather than the funeral industry, is responsible for our funeral practices-because it demands “the best” in embalming and merchandise for the dead-is one often expounded by funeral men. ‘We are merely giving the public what it wants,’ they say” (pg. 123).
Analysis:
It saddens me to see that the funeral industry takes advantage of emotions in order for their pockets to be filled. They use a number of alternatives to try and fool their customers to pay them more money than needed. Our society is very self-centered; in all of the books I have read in this course I noticed that people in our society will do anything to get what they want, in this case it would be money. They will make up excuses to earn some extra cash, for example when a customer wants a body to be cremated they are offered space for the um to be kept in at a “good” price. I think that’s absurd, now a day’s people will offer anything they can in order to get a hold of money. Our society is fond of taking one aspect and dissecting it in every which way possible to get a good profit. I find it to be strange that so many of us tend to fall for it; we are always too busy with unnecessary occupancies to notice the harsh reality which we are facing. With every twist and turn we take in this society we will be fooled to pay more than what we should actually be paying. I think Mitford does a good job of getting this point across to her readers. She uses her sense of humor to keep her readers entertained, yet realize what goes on in our society behind drawn curtains.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Hwk 49
To Kevin:
Kevin,
You had a good mix of interviewees. Your interviews helped prove my point about religion/beliefs and how they shape how one approaches care of the dead. I personally did not agree with everything that was said. For example when Danny stated: “The person is dead so they won’t know how they’re body was treated.” I believe that the way a body is treated has a lot to do with their afterlife. It should be treated with care and respect and have a proper disposal which would be a burial (this is my own opinion based on my faith). I am not saying that one should spend 10,000 dollars on a funeral, but I think it’s the thought that counts. You wouldn’t want to do physical damage to the body such as kicking it or jumping up and down on it; it just wouldn’t seem right. That is why I disagree with Danny when he stated that the dead person won’t be affected by how his/her body is treated afterwards. I think this thought of his has a lot to do with him being an atheist; since he doesn’t have certain beliefs he doesn’t really have anything to believe in. He seems to go along with whatever he wants to follow. Thanks for sharing your interviews and your thoughts.
Amber M.
To Martyna:
Martyna,
It was interesting to read about your parents’ and their thoughts on care of the dead. I liked how they connected back to your Polish culture. When I interviewed my parents it was the same case; they kept connecting back to our Pakistani culture and Islam. I believe that faith affects how one shapes their thoughts on topics such as this one. You have grown up in a Christian family, and you were taught their way of approaching death. I think that the questions you asked your parents throughout this interview were a bit out of the ordinary which I thought made your interview interesting. Both of your parents gave honest answers and they seem to be good enough. In our society it is not common to be approached with such questions. At one point you asked you dad if he was afraid of death and he replied by saying that he does not try to think about it. This is true; I myself do not try to think about how I would like to be treated after death; this doesn’t seem to be much of a worry at this point in our lives. But what we don’t understand is that death can approach us any time sooner or later; so why not give it a thought now? Thanks for sharing the interview you conducted with your parents and your thoughts around it.
Amber M.
To Sam:
Sam,
The way you took on this assignment was interesting. You had a couple of quotes in there which helped me understand how your parents approached such questions. It was interesting to compare the responses your mother gave you to what your father gave you. Your mother isn’t as attached to her religious beliefs as much as your father. Because your mother isn’t really religious, all she cares about is her remembrance after her death. Your father does not have a set plan about how he wants his body to be cared for after his death. I like how you were honest throughout your post; your father didn’t seem to have much of a say on the topic. I feel as if many of us are afraid to think of death related issues; it is not something many of us like to discuss, take your father for example. I am sure when you approached your father with such questions he must have felt a bit uneasy; this can be concluded from the vague responses he gave you. Overall good job, I like how you stated your hypothesis towards the end.
Amber M.
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From Kevin:
Amber,
I like how you started your post with that overall summary, it made the post easier to read, and lets the reader know what's going on.
It was impressive that you used quotes in this post, even though they weren't asked for. It made this post have a more authentic feel to it.
You're structure was pretty easy to follow: summary, interview 1, interview 2, interview 3, analysis paragraphs.
It was interesting to find out about the Islamic traditions around death after learning about the Jewish traditions from sams post.
One suggestion I'd make is to keep it short and sweet. Keep only the most important information.
From Martyna:
Amber,
You described interviews with three teenagers of diverse religious backgrounds. This allowed you to make comparisons between different points of view.
I was particularly interested in the interview with your cousin. It included a brief description of a traditional Islamic funeral, which gave me new insight on the subject. Even though I lived in an Arabic country I never came in contact with the culture's attitude toward death (that is - until I read your post).
The the end, you connected what you found out in your interviews to your own opinions. This shows that you thought through and analyzed the information you obtained from your interviewees.
I agree - we don't usually talk about death. I appreciate that you had the courage to ask some of your questions despite them being rather unusual.
Your post was clear and interesting to read. Thank you,
Martyna
From Sam:
Amber,
I think they way you went about this interview was interesting, and there was clearly a lot of work put into it. You took careful notes on what the people were saying and you really payed attention to what caught your interest. You make interesting points about how the christian people weren't sure about whether not they wanted to be cremated. I think that is important to observe the way people with religious differences view the care of the dead. One of the things i would change about this is that you seemed focused on one topic, but i felt like it was too broad. You made remarks about religion and cremation, but you didn't go too in-depth on it. I feel if you took what these people said and was able to take your own personal bias out of it and see how different ideas can all revolve around the same basic concept and maybe see how these people can get these different ideas, then this would have been a lot more insightful. But i did honestly enjoy reading this. Good blog post Amber.
Sam
From Mentor (Mom):
Amber,
I decided to focus on your third paragraph which was about your interview with your cousin. It is nice to know that society has a big impact on how much someone knows about a topic like this one. Here in the United States not many people are educated on the topic of death and caring for the dead. Your cousin tends to show a lot of knowledge on the issue. He had the correct answers according to Islam for every question you asked him. Here, people usually attend funerals just to pay their respects to the ones who have passed on, but later on forget about the event. In your cousins case he seems to know much more about why everything is the way it is when caring for the dead according to his Pakistani society and culture. I am sure you were able to learn a few things yourself while interviewing him. I enjoyed reading your thoughts towards the end. I agree with what you had to say; “Society, culture and religion play a big role in what people have to say about topics such as caring for the dead.”
Mom
From Protege (Brother):
Amber,
You wanted me to focus on the fourth paragraph where you interview your 17 year old friend. I haven’t attended a funeral before, but I am sure I will feel the same way she did if I was to attend one any time soon. I think it takes time for death to actually become reality and this starts to become reality when you are caring for the body. From reading about your friends’ experience, I am getting the message that funerals put you in a daze. You feel as if you need to be pinched to believe that this is reality. Nobody wants to admit that someone has passed on. You later on mention that she is Christian; this gives her the option of having her body cremated. Some beliefs allow cremation, but others don’t; there is no right or wrong in her situation.
Nabil
Kevin,
You had a good mix of interviewees. Your interviews helped prove my point about religion/beliefs and how they shape how one approaches care of the dead. I personally did not agree with everything that was said. For example when Danny stated: “The person is dead so they won’t know how they’re body was treated.” I believe that the way a body is treated has a lot to do with their afterlife. It should be treated with care and respect and have a proper disposal which would be a burial (this is my own opinion based on my faith). I am not saying that one should spend 10,000 dollars on a funeral, but I think it’s the thought that counts. You wouldn’t want to do physical damage to the body such as kicking it or jumping up and down on it; it just wouldn’t seem right. That is why I disagree with Danny when he stated that the dead person won’t be affected by how his/her body is treated afterwards. I think this thought of his has a lot to do with him being an atheist; since he doesn’t have certain beliefs he doesn’t really have anything to believe in. He seems to go along with whatever he wants to follow. Thanks for sharing your interviews and your thoughts.
Amber M.
To Martyna:
Martyna,
It was interesting to read about your parents’ and their thoughts on care of the dead. I liked how they connected back to your Polish culture. When I interviewed my parents it was the same case; they kept connecting back to our Pakistani culture and Islam. I believe that faith affects how one shapes their thoughts on topics such as this one. You have grown up in a Christian family, and you were taught their way of approaching death. I think that the questions you asked your parents throughout this interview were a bit out of the ordinary which I thought made your interview interesting. Both of your parents gave honest answers and they seem to be good enough. In our society it is not common to be approached with such questions. At one point you asked you dad if he was afraid of death and he replied by saying that he does not try to think about it. This is true; I myself do not try to think about how I would like to be treated after death; this doesn’t seem to be much of a worry at this point in our lives. But what we don’t understand is that death can approach us any time sooner or later; so why not give it a thought now? Thanks for sharing the interview you conducted with your parents and your thoughts around it.
Amber M.
To Sam:
Sam,
The way you took on this assignment was interesting. You had a couple of quotes in there which helped me understand how your parents approached such questions. It was interesting to compare the responses your mother gave you to what your father gave you. Your mother isn’t as attached to her religious beliefs as much as your father. Because your mother isn’t really religious, all she cares about is her remembrance after her death. Your father does not have a set plan about how he wants his body to be cared for after his death. I like how you were honest throughout your post; your father didn’t seem to have much of a say on the topic. I feel as if many of us are afraid to think of death related issues; it is not something many of us like to discuss, take your father for example. I am sure when you approached your father with such questions he must have felt a bit uneasy; this can be concluded from the vague responses he gave you. Overall good job, I like how you stated your hypothesis towards the end.
Amber M.
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From Kevin:
Amber,
I like how you started your post with that overall summary, it made the post easier to read, and lets the reader know what's going on.
It was impressive that you used quotes in this post, even though they weren't asked for. It made this post have a more authentic feel to it.
You're structure was pretty easy to follow: summary, interview 1, interview 2, interview 3, analysis paragraphs.
It was interesting to find out about the Islamic traditions around death after learning about the Jewish traditions from sams post.
One suggestion I'd make is to keep it short and sweet. Keep only the most important information.
From Martyna:
Amber,
You described interviews with three teenagers of diverse religious backgrounds. This allowed you to make comparisons between different points of view.
I was particularly interested in the interview with your cousin. It included a brief description of a traditional Islamic funeral, which gave me new insight on the subject. Even though I lived in an Arabic country I never came in contact with the culture's attitude toward death (that is - until I read your post).
The the end, you connected what you found out in your interviews to your own opinions. This shows that you thought through and analyzed the information you obtained from your interviewees.
I agree - we don't usually talk about death. I appreciate that you had the courage to ask some of your questions despite them being rather unusual.
Your post was clear and interesting to read. Thank you,
Martyna
From Sam:
Amber,
I think they way you went about this interview was interesting, and there was clearly a lot of work put into it. You took careful notes on what the people were saying and you really payed attention to what caught your interest. You make interesting points about how the christian people weren't sure about whether not they wanted to be cremated. I think that is important to observe the way people with religious differences view the care of the dead. One of the things i would change about this is that you seemed focused on one topic, but i felt like it was too broad. You made remarks about religion and cremation, but you didn't go too in-depth on it. I feel if you took what these people said and was able to take your own personal bias out of it and see how different ideas can all revolve around the same basic concept and maybe see how these people can get these different ideas, then this would have been a lot more insightful. But i did honestly enjoy reading this. Good blog post Amber.
Sam
From Mentor (Mom):
Amber,
I decided to focus on your third paragraph which was about your interview with your cousin. It is nice to know that society has a big impact on how much someone knows about a topic like this one. Here in the United States not many people are educated on the topic of death and caring for the dead. Your cousin tends to show a lot of knowledge on the issue. He had the correct answers according to Islam for every question you asked him. Here, people usually attend funerals just to pay their respects to the ones who have passed on, but later on forget about the event. In your cousins case he seems to know much more about why everything is the way it is when caring for the dead according to his Pakistani society and culture. I am sure you were able to learn a few things yourself while interviewing him. I enjoyed reading your thoughts towards the end. I agree with what you had to say; “Society, culture and religion play a big role in what people have to say about topics such as caring for the dead.”
Mom
From Protege (Brother):
Amber,
You wanted me to focus on the fourth paragraph where you interview your 17 year old friend. I haven’t attended a funeral before, but I am sure I will feel the same way she did if I was to attend one any time soon. I think it takes time for death to actually become reality and this starts to become reality when you are caring for the body. From reading about your friends’ experience, I am getting the message that funerals put you in a daze. You feel as if you need to be pinched to believe that this is reality. Nobody wants to admit that someone has passed on. You later on mention that she is Christian; this gives her the option of having her body cremated. Some beliefs allow cremation, but others don’t; there is no right or wrong in her situation.
Nabil
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Hwk 50
Precis:
The American Way of Death (Revisited) By Jessica Mitford
Mitford is humorous as she approaches the funeral industry in our society in her revised version of the original book titled The American Way of Death which was published in 1963. Firstly she attends a seminar where she discusses her book and receives various comments from her audience. Later on she presents the issue of how the dead are cared for. Terms revolving around death are being exchanged for words that seem to sound more acceptable. Mitford then talks about the profession of funerals and the certain rules which are followed. Funeral directors make rules which will help them collect as much money as possible from their potential customers. Caskets are arranged in a various number of ways resulting in different price ranges; this helps the customer chose which casket is appropriate for their personal situation. Emotions are usually played with when it comes to the money which will be paid for such services; this tends to affect the customers decisions. Mitford then talks about how the body is readied for its casket, later on mentioning the topic of embalming.
Quotes:
- “Motels for the dead! That’s it, of course-a swimming pool and TV the only missing features.” (pg. 39)
- "How true; once the blood is removed, chances of live burial are indeed remote" (page 46).
- “Our customs require the presentation of our dead in the semblance of normality…unmarred by the ravages of illness, disease or mutilation,” (pg.47)
Analysis:
I found it surprising that people in our society as of today take advantage of everything they can in order to collect as much money as they can. In this case funeral directors take advantage of the situation and make their customers pay more money for reason. I think Mitford is right when she said that the funeral industry is brainwashed to believe inaccurate information. I personally feel that our society likes to take advantage of opportunities such as this by making up excuses. No matter what the situation may be they only tend to care about the amount of money going in their pocket. I think it’s absurd to do that within the funeral industry because this tends to deal with people’s emotions and usually at the time customers are emotionally sensitive. While reading, I was able to connect to the book I read in the birth unit titled Born in the USA. There they talked about hospitals and women having C-sections while paying large sums of money, even though they are not getting the attention they need. It’s the same type of idea here but with the funeral industry. In both cases the bigger authorities such as the doctors or funeral directors only seem to care about the money instead of the happiness of their customers. Overall I think Mitford does a good job of introducing the funeral industry to the public. Such issues seem to be hidden from society, but this text helps readers such as I realize the truth.
The American Way of Death (Revisited) By Jessica Mitford
Mitford is humorous as she approaches the funeral industry in our society in her revised version of the original book titled The American Way of Death which was published in 1963. Firstly she attends a seminar where she discusses her book and receives various comments from her audience. Later on she presents the issue of how the dead are cared for. Terms revolving around death are being exchanged for words that seem to sound more acceptable. Mitford then talks about the profession of funerals and the certain rules which are followed. Funeral directors make rules which will help them collect as much money as possible from their potential customers. Caskets are arranged in a various number of ways resulting in different price ranges; this helps the customer chose which casket is appropriate for their personal situation. Emotions are usually played with when it comes to the money which will be paid for such services; this tends to affect the customers decisions. Mitford then talks about how the body is readied for its casket, later on mentioning the topic of embalming.
Quotes:
- “Motels for the dead! That’s it, of course-a swimming pool and TV the only missing features.” (pg. 39)
- "How true; once the blood is removed, chances of live burial are indeed remote" (page 46).
- “Our customs require the presentation of our dead in the semblance of normality…unmarred by the ravages of illness, disease or mutilation,” (pg.47)
Analysis:
I found it surprising that people in our society as of today take advantage of everything they can in order to collect as much money as they can. In this case funeral directors take advantage of the situation and make their customers pay more money for reason. I think Mitford is right when she said that the funeral industry is brainwashed to believe inaccurate information. I personally feel that our society likes to take advantage of opportunities such as this by making up excuses. No matter what the situation may be they only tend to care about the amount of money going in their pocket. I think it’s absurd to do that within the funeral industry because this tends to deal with people’s emotions and usually at the time customers are emotionally sensitive. While reading, I was able to connect to the book I read in the birth unit titled Born in the USA. There they talked about hospitals and women having C-sections while paying large sums of money, even though they are not getting the attention they need. It’s the same type of idea here but with the funeral industry. In both cases the bigger authorities such as the doctors or funeral directors only seem to care about the money instead of the happiness of their customers. Overall I think Mitford does a good job of introducing the funeral industry to the public. Such issues seem to be hidden from society, but this text helps readers such as I realize the truth.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Hwk 48
I decided to talk to my mom and my dad about the care of the dead. Their beliefs were similar to mine and most of what they had to say on this topic was expected (in my mind). I was glad to choose my mom and dad for this interview since they both have the same beliefs and thoughts, but they have had different experiences and approaches to care of the dead. I asked them questions referring to their experiences with care of the dead and disposal of the body.
My dad has had some experience with caring for the dead after moving here. He has attended a funeral or two for people that he was close to. “I feel that it is important to attend a funeral and pay your respects; you didn’t have to be close with the person who has passed on, but you should still offer them your prayers. It isn’t mandatory, but I feel that it is appropriate for one to do so.” One funeral he attended was over a year ago; it was for a man he worked with for some time. The cause of death was natural since he was aged, so it wasn’t unexpected. This man was Jewish so the funeral ceremony went according to their religious beliefs. I asked my dad about the funeral service; he told me about prayers that were recited in Hebrew and the body which was put in a coffin. The coffin was closed since in Judaism there is no option which allows the casket to be left open. My dad said that his experience at this funeral was interesting because much of the rituals which were performed were similar when comparing them to the funerals which he has attended back in Pakistan. But there were women throughout the whole funeral and it was held at a cemetery home, whereas in the funerals he attended in Pakistan, the women are limited to their homes and the funeral is held at the grave site (for men). I decided to research on care of the dead in Judaism and learned that much of what they do is very similar to what is done in Islam when caring for the dead. For example, both in Islam and Judaism the body is purified and there is no option of cremation.
My mom has never experienced anything related to the care of the dead while living here in the United States. She was only able to tell me about her experiences while she was back at home in Pakistan. “A lot of the rituals which occur while caring for the dead in Pakistan differ in many ways when comparing how the dead are cared for here.” She told me about the different roles males and females play throughout a funeral. She talked about all the women who are gathered at the house of the person who had passed on; they offer their prayers and help out by cooking food in the name of the one who has passed on so that it can be passed out to the poor and needy and the spirit can receive its rewards. The men are the ones which take care of all the outside work such as taking the body to the burial site and offering prayers there.“There is usually a forty day grieving period where everyone pays their respects and offer their prayers, but now it is more common to have a three day grieving period because of what the Prophet Muhammad had said ‘The grieving period after ones death should not exceed three days’”. I asked my mom why women are not allowed to join the men at the grave site; she said that it’s not appropriate, supposedly if females go to the grave site the spirits view them in a negative way. I asked my mom about cremation and she didn’t really want to talk about it; it didn’t feel right talking about it because it made her have negative thoughts. All she said was that cremation is wrong and the only right way to dispose a body is to bury it because that is the only option offered to Muslims.
I think that religion plays a big role in how one cares for the dead. After hearing what my parents had to say about their own personal experiences and thoughts on the topic, I figured that there is a wrong and a right in everything and this differs depending upon ones beliefs. Here in the United States many individuals are free to approach anything however they want; in this case caring for the dead is also approached in various ways. I am not saying that this only happens in the United States, but it is the most common here. In other countries which have a large population of people under the same religion, the body tends to be disposed in a certain way at a higher rate. For example in Pakistan and other countries which base their beliefs off of Islam, usually tend to bury the body instead of cremating it. This is because we strictly follow what Islam asks us to do. In Israel most of the population has beliefs based off of Judaism, meaning that they also tend to bury the body instead of referring to cremation. In India and Japan, the cremation rate is much higher because of what they believe in. All these countries and beliefs seem to have certain rules which tend to be followed while caring for the dead, whereas in the United States there is no right or wrong way of caring for the dead.
My dad has had some experience with caring for the dead after moving here. He has attended a funeral or two for people that he was close to. “I feel that it is important to attend a funeral and pay your respects; you didn’t have to be close with the person who has passed on, but you should still offer them your prayers. It isn’t mandatory, but I feel that it is appropriate for one to do so.” One funeral he attended was over a year ago; it was for a man he worked with for some time. The cause of death was natural since he was aged, so it wasn’t unexpected. This man was Jewish so the funeral ceremony went according to their religious beliefs. I asked my dad about the funeral service; he told me about prayers that were recited in Hebrew and the body which was put in a coffin. The coffin was closed since in Judaism there is no option which allows the casket to be left open. My dad said that his experience at this funeral was interesting because much of the rituals which were performed were similar when comparing them to the funerals which he has attended back in Pakistan. But there were women throughout the whole funeral and it was held at a cemetery home, whereas in the funerals he attended in Pakistan, the women are limited to their homes and the funeral is held at the grave site (for men). I decided to research on care of the dead in Judaism and learned that much of what they do is very similar to what is done in Islam when caring for the dead. For example, both in Islam and Judaism the body is purified and there is no option of cremation.
My mom has never experienced anything related to the care of the dead while living here in the United States. She was only able to tell me about her experiences while she was back at home in Pakistan. “A lot of the rituals which occur while caring for the dead in Pakistan differ in many ways when comparing how the dead are cared for here.” She told me about the different roles males and females play throughout a funeral. She talked about all the women who are gathered at the house of the person who had passed on; they offer their prayers and help out by cooking food in the name of the one who has passed on so that it can be passed out to the poor and needy and the spirit can receive its rewards. The men are the ones which take care of all the outside work such as taking the body to the burial site and offering prayers there.“There is usually a forty day grieving period where everyone pays their respects and offer their prayers, but now it is more common to have a three day grieving period because of what the Prophet Muhammad had said ‘The grieving period after ones death should not exceed three days’”. I asked my mom why women are not allowed to join the men at the grave site; she said that it’s not appropriate, supposedly if females go to the grave site the spirits view them in a negative way. I asked my mom about cremation and she didn’t really want to talk about it; it didn’t feel right talking about it because it made her have negative thoughts. All she said was that cremation is wrong and the only right way to dispose a body is to bury it because that is the only option offered to Muslims.
I think that religion plays a big role in how one cares for the dead. After hearing what my parents had to say about their own personal experiences and thoughts on the topic, I figured that there is a wrong and a right in everything and this differs depending upon ones beliefs. Here in the United States many individuals are free to approach anything however they want; in this case caring for the dead is also approached in various ways. I am not saying that this only happens in the United States, but it is the most common here. In other countries which have a large population of people under the same religion, the body tends to be disposed in a certain way at a higher rate. For example in Pakistan and other countries which base their beliefs off of Islam, usually tend to bury the body instead of cremating it. This is because we strictly follow what Islam asks us to do. In Israel most of the population has beliefs based off of Judaism, meaning that they also tend to bury the body instead of referring to cremation. In India and Japan, the cremation rate is much higher because of what they believe in. All these countries and beliefs seem to have certain rules which tend to be followed while caring for the dead, whereas in the United States there is no right or wrong way of caring for the dead.
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